Meow or Die

I love cats.

They feel like happiness squeezed into a physical form.

Even their mere existence is enough to captivate me.

I love how can be completely absorbed in play one moment, then suddenly gaze up at the sky, lost in thought, not a care in the world.

Cats and I go way back.

There have always been cats in our house since I was born, and through adoptions and fostering, the number has gone up and down over the years—we have twelve now.

One of them has lived even longer than my sixteen years. Her name is Moo, and she's seventeen.

In human years, she'd be quite the grandma. The name "Moo" has a very simple yet interesting reason behind it—her white fur with black patches makes her look like a little cow.

You're tired from the hospital, aren't you, Moo? Let's have some treats when we get home.

I lifted the cat carrier up to face level. Moo was looking out through the clear plastic window. I could feel her solid weight in my arms—thirteen pounds, to be exact.

When Moo met my gaze, she blinked with her big eyes in that funny, mysterious way cats do. Her eyes are a pale yellow-green, just like peeled grapes.

Living a long life has its consequences. It comes with a lot of health problems, and Moo is no different. Her recent checkup results weren't good, so she's been making regular trips to the vet. Today was another one of those days. I'd taken her to the vet after school ended before heading home.

It's March already, but the wind still feels cold.

I cradled the carrier to my chest and looked at Moo. Her face swayed with every step I took. On the way back from the hospital, I always took the same route I used for school—the jetty path that ran along the top of the riverbank.

The sun had just set, so the sky overhead was a deep indigo blue that seemed to draw you in.

Above the horizon stretching across the river, reddish-gold light still lingered in the sky.

The dark silhouette of the cityscape on the far bank looked like a tiny diorama when viewed from a distance.

A cold, strong wind blew across the riverbank, carrying with it the night’s scent—something like scorched dry grass.

I didn't see anyone else walking along the jetty path besides myself. About an hour ago, there probably would have been plenty of students heading home from the school and women returning from shopping.

It was a strange time; it was a little too late to call it the evening but still a bit too early for the night to truly fall. The sun had long since set, and only the afterglow remained in the sky.

It was the magic hour that comes at twilight, when day and night switch places.

On the slope ahead, about twenty meters from where I stood on the jetty, I spotted a human silhouette standing exactly where the last traces of light were fading.

The first thing I noticed was the skirt that was a part of the same uniform I was wearing.

What caught my eye next was the color of her hair.

At first it seemed blonde, but when I looked closer, I realized it looked so because of the hues of the setting sun. Her hair was shoulder-length ash silver that gleamed like snow leopard fur.

Beautiful . . .

I was instantly captivated by the girl's mesmerizing profile.

Those perfectly refined features and deep, dark blue eyes—she was undoubtedly a foreigner.

She seemed to go to the same school as me, but I'd never seen such a beautiful girl before. I was sure there wasn't anyone quite like her in my first-year class; maybe she was a senior.

Standing on the embankment as evening shadows gathered, she looked down the slope with a sharp gaze as if her arch enemy stood there.

I followed her gaze to see what she had been looking at.

There it was . . . about five meters away from the girl, down the slope.

Huh . . . ?

It was a stray cat sitting primly on the grass—a calico with a white belly and brown and black stripes on its back.

It sat with its front paws neatly together like a manekineko, a lucky cat figurine, quietly gazing up at the girl standing on the slope above it with calm eyes.

The silver-haired girl was staring back at the cat with a serious expression . . . No, not staring, the two were glaring at each other.

What's going on?

I watched the girl and the stray cat facing each other in the twilight quietly.

I stood still, fascinated by the girl's beauty and the mysterious aura she radiated. But more than that, I was curious about the oddity of this whole situation.

A faint tension could be felt from her slightly forward-leaning posture. But it also conveyed a sense of poised stillness—like the calm just before release.

Like that of an athlete at the starting line. It would surface occasionally in the lines of her slender neck or behind her knees, then disappear again.

And then . . .

It felt like all the sound had vanished from the world.

My entire attention was focused on chasing the girl who had jumped off the slope all of a sudden.

She looked as aggressive as a lion pouncing on its prey as she flew down toward the bottom of the embankment at incredible speed. Headfirst, no less.

And there in her path was the calico cat.

The girl spread her arms wide and pounced desperately, as if trying to embrace the stray cat.

Her blue eyes, full of determination, were fixed on her target . . .

Meow!

The little calico casually dodged her attack and bolted up the embankment in a mad dash.

Interestingly, cats can run up to 30 miles per hour, faster than any sprinter, and can go from zero to top speed in an instant.

Having lost her target and her balance, the girl fell headfirst into the grass with a thud. I couldn't help but cover my eyes with one hand.

Ouch, that looks painful! I hope she's okay.

I was worried about the girl who'd just face-planted, but when she got up unscathed, I breathed a sigh of relief.

She stared in the direction the cat had gone with an angry yet enchanting expression on her face. Then, muttering something in a foreign language, she brushed the grass and dirt off her clothes and walked away.

Her petite figure melted away into the riverbank that grew darker with each passing moment after sunset.

I wonder if I'll see her again . . .

I knew nothing about her, but I was hoping to see her again. I wanted to see her again.

Her beauty was ethereal, as if she was of divine creation, yet she behaved in a surprisingly strange manner . . . somehow reminiscent of those mysterious creatures I love so much.

The next day.

I passed through the school gates as usual and headed to the school building. Beneath the row of budding cherry trees, students in the same Tobamori All-Girls' High School uniforms flowed toward the main entrance.

I grabbed my stuff from my locker and headed down the first-floor hallway toward the classroom.

Good morning!

I greeted the classmates gathered around my desk. I usually sat in the second row from the windows, somewhere in the middle.

Morning, Kohana! Your ears are red. And, so cold!

Hey, stop! That tickles!

Ume, the tallest girl in our class, was squishing my earlobes, which had gotten cold due to the chilly wind blowing outside. Eri, who'd been listening to music in the seat next to mine, pulled off her headphones and turned toward us.

Kohana, did you know? There's supposed to be a transfer student coming today.

Huh?! I had no idea!

I was surprised to hear such news first thing in the morning.

Finals are coming up soon, then it’s spring break and we move up a grade. I wonder if it’s a sudden decision because of family circumstances?

You may be right. It really is unusual.

While agreeing with Eri, I decided to ask the two of them about something that had been on my mind since yesterday.

Oh, speaking of which, have you heard anything about a foreigner in our second or third year . . .

That's when it happened.

The classroom door suddenly opened, and our homeroom teacher, Ms. Higuchi, came in. It was a little earlier than when our usual homeroom period began.

And behind the teacher . . .

What?!

The very object of my greatest curiosity had just walked in.

Oh, wow . . .

Silver hair! Wait, is she a foreigner?

It was the same mysterious girl who had staged that enigmatic showdown with a cat on the riverbank yesterday.

Seeing her up close like this, she was surprisingly petite, probably only five feet tall.

Still in the same uniform as yesterday, she was prompted by the teacher to stand in front of the blackboard.

Girls, I'd like to introduce a new student who will be joining our class starting today.

Everyone in the classroom fell completely silent and focused on the girl.

Spellbound sighs could be heard from all around.

Yes, everyone had already noticed how incredibly beautiful she was.

She's gorgeous . . .

Aww . . . she's so tiny! And her face is small too . . .

All the students were busy admiring the enchantress.

Well then, would you please introduce yourself?

The girl gave a tiny nod at the teacher’s words.

Then she turned toward the blackboard, picked up a piece of chalk, and began writing her name.

A harsh sound, similar to that of a machine gun, rattled out.

The white letters that appeared on the dark board looked like English but somehow seemed to be a different language entirely. I'd never seen those characters before.

Hello, everyone.

The girl turned back toward us without changing her expression in the slightest.

I am Anna Gratskaya. I've come to Japan from Russia. I hope we'll get along well.

She spoke in fluent Japanese, like what one might hear in a dubbed movie, with a tone like a soldier in a Hollywood movie.

And that was how we met.

I hate cats.

I hate their smug expressions. They act like they're the most graceful creatures on Earth.

I hate their arrogant behavior. They're so reckless, and useless.

I hate how they sneak up on you, appearing right by your feet all of a sudden like some kind of assassin.

Yet there are countless humans in this world who desperately need these silly cats.

And I, too, despite calling myself a cat-hater, was one of those fools.

Yet . . . as utterly hopeless as it may be, I still need cats.

Even after concluding my introduction, the atmosphere in the classroom remained buzzing with no sign of settling down.

It made sense. For most Japanese people, the presence of a silver-haired, blue-eyed Russian girl might be an unwelcome foreign element.

From what I know, harmony is of utmost importance to Japanese people. Everyone tries their best to maintain harmony, and they often show exclusionary reactions toward those who disrupt it.

This buzzing in the classroom probably meant I was being recognized as an existence that went against such harmony. The reactions felt hostile.

But for me, this was actually a desirable outcome.

If no one comes near, I’m free to act as I wish. I’m in the middle of a life-or-death mission here, and the last thing I need is someone getting in my way.

And yet . . .

Hey, what's Russia like? Is it crazy cold every single day?

What does your dad do?

Do you like Japanese anime and stuff?

Whoa, even the air around you feels totally different . . . It’s like nourishment for the soul . . .

Anna, do you have any siblings? You're so beautiful! I'm sure your mom is gorgeous too!

Oh God, marry me already!

First break period. I was surrounded by a massive crowd of classmates.

My assigned seat was in the center of the window-side row. I badly wanted to go there and take my seat, but I was subjected to a relentless barrage of questions. Some were even slipping into disturbing delusions amid the chaos.

This was a problem.

At the same time, I recalled something else about Japanese people. It isn't common for them to encounter foreigners every day. Japan is an island nation, after all. Perhaps curiosity engulfed them even before their exclusionary instincts could kick in.

They were reacting as if I were an exotic animal at a zoo.

They didn't seem to be worried that this beast might have fangs.

This must be the drawback of growing up in a war-free, peaceful country. If that's the case, changing that mindset quickly is absolutely essential.

Let me warn you.

The room fell silent the moment I uttered those words.

I am far more dangerous than my appearance may suggest. I cannot guarantee your safety should you approach carelessly. I advise you to maintain a suitable distance when interacting.

In my previous life, the disguise of a petite sixteen-year-old girl had served me well as camouflage whenever I infiltrated deep into enemy territory, approached targets, and escaped from hostile zones while completing the missions.

But now, the mission assigned to me is not to kill anyone.

It's to live as a part of this peaceful landscape while protecting my own life and surviving in times of crisis. And for that purpose, I intend to use any means necessary.

Since there's no telling what might happen during the course of my mission, I want to avoid endangering the lives of these girls as much as possible. For that reason, I had to give them a warning so direct that there would be no room for misunderstanding.

This should make it clear to even the silliest of them all.

This should show them what a misfit Anna Gratskaya is in their world.

But just two seconds after my threatening statement . . .

So . . . COOOOL!

What was that?! It literally felt like a scene from a movie!

It was so much like that legendary "touch me and you'll get burned" dialogue! It's the first time I've heard it outside those romance novels . . .

Gosh, I should've recorded that! Can you say it one more time? Please?

So cute and so cool!

Just then, a sudden squeal burst out, swelling into an uncontrollable commotion.

Wha . . .

Losing one's calm in an unexpected situation usually worsens the problem, but with this one, I could only be bewildered.

Had the meaning of my words not gotten through to these girls?

No, that couldn't be the issue. My Japanese was almost perfect. I'd even gotten approval from Yuki, whose own mother was Japanese.

That was really . . . a warning. Didn't you get that?

Huh? Oh, come on! We didn't mind. Beautiful flowers always come with thorns, right? So, chill.

You saying stuff like that is only making us more curious!

They understood my words well. Yet somehow the message wasn't clear. Why was that?

But what do you mean by dangerous?

Like . . . you'll explode or something?

Hahaha! No way!

I finally understood what was happening.

This situation was purely the result of differences between the environments that these girls and I belonged to.

They probably thought the danger I warned about only existed in the world of entertainment.

I assure you, it is neither a joke nor an exaggeration.

Oh come on! I'm sure you were talking about dying from cuteness overload, but . . .

Actually, just the other day my four-year-old cousin said something similar to me. Something like "you'll die in three seconds!" You know, that kind of thing.

Oh totally! Kids pick up anime lines so easily.

I see! So you just wanted to use some cool Japanese phrases you just learned, right?

What have I done?

By the time I realized my mistake, it was already too late. Their attitude toward me had become like doting on a child who was trying to act all tough and grown-up.

Apparently, the nickname for Anna in Russian is Anya.

Someone had looked it up on their smartphone, and the moment she shared this with others, all my classmates began repeating it.

Aww, so cute! It fits perfectly. Anna, can we call you Anya?

While the whole situation was quite distressing, I was used to being called by that name, so I didn't really care.

As you wish.

Seriously? I love how you talk. It's so cool! I want to be held by you right now! No wait, I want to hold you!

I just want to spoil you silly! Now I really understand why grandmas do that all the time!

I want to take you home and build you a throne . . .

Some of this was starting to sound inappropriate.

Good grief, the girls of this country are truly naive.

I suddenly remembered that today was my first time formally attending a school. I should've seen it coming.

As I sighed and answered the trivial questions of my classmates one by one, I suddenly felt someone staring at me from a distance.

When I turned around, a girl sitting in the seat next to me was indeed looking in my direction.

She was a pretty girl. Her glossy, shoulder-length hair and pink cheeks added to her beauty, but her eyes, gentle and kind, were narrowed in apparent amusement.

So we meet again. I didn't know we were in the same class.

She was the girl who had been watching me from the riverbank yesterday. Seeing the uniform she wore, I knew she was a student at the same school.

Huh? Did you see me yesterday?

Her eyes widened when she heard my words, as if she was genuinely surprised.

Wait, wait. Kohana, when did you meet Anya?

And it sounds like some kind of fated encounter too . . . Lucky you, Kohana!

My classmates were surprised when they learned that we knew each other.

So your name is Kohana.

Yeah. Kohana Matsukaze. Nice to meet you, um . . . Anya.

Kohana smiled radiantly as she called my name.

Seeing that smile, I somehow felt a small ache rising deep in my chest, so I looked away.

Hey, do you like cats, Anya?

Kohana was so curious that she paid no mind to my reaction.

I saw you chasing that stray cat yesterday on the riverbank.

Hearing those words, my face instantly flushed red.

It was the shame of remembering what had happened yesterday.

Yes, Kohana had witnessed the incident . . . the disgraceful spectacle of the defeat I so desperately wanted to erase from my memory. I was so embarrassed that I felt an overwhelming urge to tear at my hair.

Hey Anya, are you blushing?

On top of everything else, you like cats too! Anya, you're totally overloading on cute factors!

I tried hard to focus and control my anger.

No, I don't like cats. I actually hate them.

Really? You don't have to be shy about it, you know?

It's true. I'm allergic to cats.

I tried to correct the record by stating facts, but Kohana's delighted smile didn't budge.

That just proves you love cats, Anya.

What?

Did she say that I, of all people, was a fan of those creatures?

Those troublesome, infuriating beings who had my fate in their grasp?

It was a preposterous statement.

Being allergic to cats but still wanting to interact with them . . . It must be because you love them more than anything, right?

Oh totally! There can't be any other reason . . . which means Anya is a total tsundere! Hehe!

Tundra? No wait, this couldn't be about climate and landscapes.

Right, it was a Japanese pop culture term used for people whose attitude and true feelings differed significantly.

That's not it. I really . . . Damn.

I knew arguing further wouldn't get me anywhere. So I swallowed my words reluctantly.

That's not why I needed cats.

But I had no idea cats could be that agile. Matching their speed would require an accuracy equivalent to that of dodging bullets. Running after them whimsically is of no use.

I rattled off my thoughts to shake off my inner turmoil.

I worried my phrasing was a bit off, but none of my classmates called me out on it. Instead, I felt surrounded with warmth, protective gazes, and gentle smiles.

That's true. Cats are pretty quick.

Kohana took her own time to react.

But don't you think chasing them around is kind of pointless? If you chase a cat, it'll just keep running away from you. But if you stay perfectly still, they may come to you willingly.

What kind of incomprehensible behavior is that? They are not magnets . . . Do you mean to tell me they are mind readers?

Seeing me tilt my head in confusion, Kohana couldn't help but laugh.

Well, cats are afraid of humans, but they love us just as much.

Her words sounded like some kind of riddle.

I still couldn't understand cats. If anything, this conversation made them seem even more troublesome. I should really stay away from them as much as possible.

But even so . . . I still needed cats.

Lunch break.

Kohana took me to the school store, where I bought bread, and showed me around. We also ate lunch together on a bench in the schoolyard.

On the way back to the classroom, we stopped at the first-floor restroom. However, all the stalls were occupied, so we ended up using the second-floor restroom instead.

Oh no, the bell's ringing! We need to hurry, Anya!

As the chimes of the bell echoed through the building, Kohana rushed down the stairs from the second floor to reach the classroom on time.

Ah!

Maybe because she was running too fast, Kohana missed a step and lost her balance, about to fall backward and hit her head.

Without a moment's hesitation, I jumped from behind Kohana and kicked off the side wall for a triangular jump—like a cat—to get ahead of her falling trajectory.

Then, in midair, I caught Kohana's falling body, and both of us flew down to the bottom of the stairs.

I landed smoothly in the first-floor hallway without any injury.

To counteract the inertia from our fall, I slid about a meter while still carrying Kohana. The soles of my shoes scraped against the linoleum floor, making a sharp squeaking sound.

The moment I stopped, the smell of rubber, burned by frictional heat, drifted up to my nose.

Every student standing there was left amazed and speechless. The hallway was immersed in silence, except for the bell that was still ringing.

What?! What was that?!

Are you okay?! Wait, did you two just fly through the air?!

Two girls falling from the sky?!

One girl princess-carrying another girl?! This is a first!

The most stunned of all was Kohana herself, who I was holding in my arms.

She was staring at my face with wide eyes, as if she had no idea what had just happened.

What . . .

It is good you are not injured.

Kohana's cheeks turned red as she finally grasped the situation.

Huh . . . ah?! Sorry, Anya! Thank you . . . !

When I put her down, Kohana instinctively tested the floor with her feet. Her body was still swaying slightly.

I mean, that was incredible! I thought you were athletic during PE earlier, but this was on a completely different level! You're so much stronger than me even though you're smaller . . .

Kohana looked at me standing beside her, her cheeks still flushed with excitement and amazement.

Were you a gymnast or something back in Russia?

Something like that. We should go. Class is about to start.

Excuses like these always helped me avoid discussing my origins and background with others.

To shake off Kohana's questions, I quickly headed down the hallway toward the classroom.

Oh . . . right. Hey, Anya!

As if remembering something, Kohana, too, started walking briskly to match my pace.

I wasn't too heavy, was I? I've been a little worried about my body weight lately . . .

She looked embarrassed when she spoke those words.

She clearly felt she might be overweight.

However, Kohana didn't feel heavier than 110 pounds. For someone who's just under 5'3", she shouldn't be considered overweight, but I suppose some insecurities are unique to teenage girls.

No, you are fine.

I wasn't sure what the most appropriate response would be, so I gave a safe answer.

Really? Well that's good then . . . haa

Why do you sigh? You should not be injured.

I still feel like I'm flying through the air . . . I mean, that was my first time experiencing anything like that.

Kohana's gaze seemed somehow dreamy and distant as she looked at me.

Things like these can make anyone fall for you, Anya!

Suddenly hearing those unexpected words caused my heart to skip a beat.

Why was I so nervous all of a sudden?

That's how it is in manga, right? If you were a boy, Anya, I might have thought you were my destined prince charming. Hahaha!

Kohana laughed innocently.

Right, it was just a hypothetical generalization. Nothing to do with us in reality.

Still nursing a subtle sense of unease, I returned to the classroom with her.

The bell rang again when the last class of the day finally ended.

As the classroom filled with the chattering students preparing to leave, two of my classmates approached my desk.

Hey there, Anya. How about we show you around the town today?

I'm sure you don't know the fun spots yet. So if you don't have anything else to do today, we'd love to help you familiarize with the area on our way home.

The tall girl of five foot nine who had approached me first was Sayaka Umeda. The other one was Eri Takesato, who always wore headphones and had bright-colored hair. From what I'd observed today, these two seemed particularly close to Kohana.

This was exactly the kind of situation I'd been dreading. I felt myself being swept into the community of these girls with no way to resist.

But it would be difficult for me to mingle with them right now. The missions I had to carry out could activate at any moment without warning.

I appreciate the offer, but . . .

Just as I was trying to think of a polite way to decline, something happened.

Thump! My heart gave an unpleasant throb.

Ach . . . !

That was the signal.

Intense pain struck every part of my body simultaneously. The agony wracking my entire body gradually made me lose consciousness. Cold sweat trickled down my body as my heart continued beating wildly.

Anya?

Are you okay? You look pale.

Their eyes were full of concern. Unable to bear it anymore, I turned around and broke into a full sprint, desperately clinging to my fading consciousness.

I could hear the surprised whispers of my classmates as I ran out of the classroom, but I had no other choice.

The mission had been activated.

I weaved through the crowds of students filling the hallway and ran straight through the school gates out of the academy.

The curse that relentlessly pursued me even after escaping Domik would never allow me to live freely.

But I was helpless. My mission was to survive while fighting against this curse, no matter how much suffering it entailed.

While running along the road, I took out my phone, unlocked it despite the intense pain assaulting my entire body, and sent a message about my situation to my only ally in Japan.

I have your current location via GPS. The nearest spot with the highest probability of encountering a cat is the riverbank.

Koshka's mechanical reply came back immediately.

Hearing his response, I clicked my tongue as I recalled yesterday's humiliation.

Please hurry up. If you don't take care of this within ten minutes of the virus onset, it will be too late.

The follow-up message spurred me on.

There was no choice but to do it anyhow.

If I failed this mission, I wouldn't live to see the dawn.

The riverbank finally came into view. I veered off the road and slid down the dirt slope covered with withered grass.

Argh . . . where are you?! Where are you, cats!

Forcing my stumbling legs to keep moving forward, I strained my eyes to spot stray cats lurking in the shadows of the grass.

This should be much easier than sniping a car running a kilometer away with an anti-materiel rifle, but with my mind clouded by pain, a cat's assassin-like stealth was a formidable enemy.

Ugh . . .

Finally, the respiratory paralysis began, and I gasped from severe oxygen deprivation. Time was running out. I probably had just a few minutes left.

It was at that moment I detected movement in the corner of my clouded vision.

Slowly, a small white, black, and brown furball emerged from deep within the bushes.

It was the same stray cat I had encountered yesterday. I could easily recognize the distinctive calico markings on its body.

Yesterday, when I had challenged it merely to practice, I faced complete defeat without even being able to touch it.

Now I had to beat this formidable opponent in such a fragile condition.

Shaking off the self-doubt, I focused all my attention on the cat in front of me.

I had to do it. If I failed, I would simply die right here.

Ah . . .

The next moment, my leg muscles gave out. Having lost the strength even to support my body, I collapsed on the spot.

Not yet, not yet . . . I reached out my trembling hand as my consciousness continued to fade.

The cat seemed to look at me carefully, as if observing something strange.

Motionless like a small mountain, it looked cruelly indifferent, just like the great gods observing the suffering of insignificant humans. There seemed to exist an unbridgeable distance between the cat and me.

Is it . . . over for me?

I was gradually losing my strength with each passing second.